just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize