remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
