margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
