i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
