i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
