Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I was not drunk enough for that final.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
