take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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