I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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