Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
