Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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