Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
