Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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