Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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