But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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