just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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