i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
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