She is in my trunk
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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