I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I need a burrito and a hug.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
