ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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