I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
