Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize