I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
