If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
