everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
