Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
