ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
