We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
