let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
