You can't motorboat a personality
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
