The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
We had to coat check the pizza.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
