I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize