i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize