I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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