It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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