wake up i wanna do it froggy style
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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