why didn't you poke me back
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
