"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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