is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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