Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
