Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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