I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize