You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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