You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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