when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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