How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Randomize
