i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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