In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize