Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
