they need to just BURY HIM!
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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