I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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